The face of Alzheimer’s and Dementia is etched on my big brother’s face. Left to die in a locked unit on the Cape. Rick could be helped but brother and sisters decided that dead parent’s money was more important to line their pockets than the life of the eldest of our family. Spent two days with Ricky last month in the cold of the Cape six feet away and forced to be masked a small group stood close by to make sure we kept our chat light. For one hour a day for two days. This was heart breaking to see my big brother so small and frail and not remembering much about life anymore. But I did get him to laugh as I dragged out our younger years of working at Fenway Park and Hart Catering over in Dorchester. Getting up at 3 to work caddying at the Hig-ham golf course as caddies. I did all the talking Rick did all the smiling and nodding as our youth came back to us even if for a moment. On the second day with ten precious minutes left Rick fell asleep as the nurse wheeled him away saying “He is tired been a busy two days.” As he turned the corner, he raised his head and waved good-bye pulling down his masked he smile and said, “Love you Donny.” And he was gone back to his locked room. I wept like a child in the parking lot leaving my big brother behind trapped in his mind for what ever time he has left. He could be home, but money has become too important for that ever to happen. And Damm, my parents and siblings for what they let happen to their eldest child and brother. Yes, I would bring him to Tex-ass to live out his days, but he still thinks he is going home someday to his wife and family so he tells me no. I am so sorry Rick for this family has left you alone to endure in this Trapped He sits there In front of the window Waiting In his chair Trapped Waiting For the end to come All day Gazing Trapped In his Own thoughts Forever Alone No more A way into the present
To my big brother Dick Tracey, I am so sorry I have let you down.